Simplifying Easter

Easter was a breeze this year. For one thing, my kids are getting older. For another, I refused to go into debt over it. We dyed some eggs, and the kids got a large chocolate figure and some snackish stuff in their baskets. That's it.



And it was enough...but luckily we got an Easter bonus! We were invited to a large Easter shindig over at a friend's house in town and it was terrific. This family has a farm with horses and a large spread of property. They fill and hide thousands of plastic Easter eggs all around the property and then invite about a hundred or so little kids to come find them Easter morning. My two youngest ones had a blast running around and hunting for them.




In addition, everyone brought food to share and the grandpa of the family gave rides in a cart attached to his tractor. The Easter bunny made an appearance, bouncing around in the fields far enough away to retain his "realness" for the little kids. There were apples to feed to the horses and lots of fun things to do.



I really enjoyed the small-town feel to this celebration, along with the realization that although I feel like I've met a lot of people around town, here were another few hundred that I hadn't seen before. We caught up with some old acquaintenances and met a few new people. What a nice morning.

I'm Sick Of Holidays - Part Deux!

Holidays suck.

I have no problem with the concept of celebrating things in our lives, but today I feel like I spend so much time, effort and money on the stupid holidays we're told to celebrate that I don't have time, strength or money for doing things I'd actually like to do with my family.

Christmas is basically fine. I like a lot of what we do and the kids are getting older and more helpful. But the rest? Pffffbbbbbtttt!

Valentine's Day is overrated. Expensive flowers, expensive cards, expensive candy (I DO NOT NEED), expensive dinners out? Forget it - I'd rather wait until Beltane (May 2nd) and just head out with my honey for a romp in the fields under the stars.



Easter? If I was Christian I would spend the day at church. I like decorating the eggs and hiding them for the kids, although in truth I find that neither exercise is nearly as much fun as it sounds like it could be. I hate the expectation that there will also be a ton of CANDY again, and possibly other gifts. This year I'm going to skip it if at all possible. Instead I'm going to buy seeds and bulbs. We can spend the day planting and getting our hands in the dirt.

Fourth of July is about as close as the United States gets to a reasonable holiday. Parades, fireworks, the whole town getting together. No present or candy. That's more like it.

Halloween? Again - I'm SICK OF THE CANDY. Could we skip it? Could we run around in the woods instead in our costumes and scare each other silly? Or could we dance around bonfires until we're absolutely exhausted, grown-ups and children alike? I actually like the part where we go house to house and there's nothing for it but to deal with the candy, but I think this holiday could be a lot more fun.

Thanksgiving - all right, that one is fine again. Good food and family. No presents, no candy. I can deal.

But still, I'm feeling a bit uninspired. Where's the fun and creativity in all this? Aren't holidays supposed to be the spice in the year - the stuff to look forward to? I can't say I look forward to any of them that much, mostly because it seems to be about work instead of play.

And because there's not much communal spirit to it all. Maybe it's just easier in warmer climates to hold outdoor celebrations. Or maybe we all have it so good all the time that celebrating a holiday isn't really that special. Maybe other people have a built in community that celebrates in more fun ways than mine does. I don't know.

I just know I feel like there could be something more.

I'm Sick Of Holidays!

I'll put the warning right here - I'm cranky today. I've got three teenagers acting like teenagers and I'm a bit fed up.

I'm also cranky because I took down the Christmas decorations and that always leaves me feeling a little flat. I actually "halved" this stuff earlier in the fall when I cleaned out my storage space, but today I sent the kids outside and spread out all the decorations, then gave myself permission to get rid of the ones I no longer like.

Here's the beginning spread:



Here's the stuff I kept for next year:



Here's the big trash bag full of stuff going to Good Will!



At least that's done.

Christmas Presents, Christmas Presents

So did I do it? Did I halve Christmas?


Pfbbbt!

I think I stuck to my budget a bit better than usual, but not well enough. I don't feel as frantic as I have in years past, and I did resist the urge to buy one last, big expensive gift for the family...it can wait.



One place I did do well was in not buying cr*p just to buy it, if you know what I mean. There will not be a whole bunch of toys that get played with once and then scrapped. I can't take all the credit for it; my kids are getting older. They know Santa's ballpark figure for gifts and they make their lists accordingly. A few expensive items, some clothing and they're set. We won't have a lot of packaging filling up our trash can come Christmas morning.

Preparing for all the special dinners on Christmas eve, Christmas day and New Years hasn't seemed too difficult either. But I'm going to start out behind in my food budget next month.

The biggest breakthrough by far has been how little time it took to prep the house for the holidays. Usually it takes me a week of moving from room to room, sorting and scrubbing and vacuuming. This year it took just a few hours to run around and get things in shape. Less junk means less cleaning. That is a (beautiful) fact.

Sometimes I Really Blow It

I'm mad at myself.

So many toys these days consist of a few pennies' worth of plastic being sold for lots and lots of dollars. I'm trying hard to resist purchasing this crap, especially when its packaging is three or four times the size of the actual product, but when the toys rank on top of my daughter's Christmas list, it's hard to pass them buy.



Littlest Pet Shops are one of the worst offenders, and one of my daughter's favorite toys, so I got a couple of them. But I noticed she's been playing with a lot of animal figurines lately, especially horses, so I wandered over to the local parent-teacher store today to look at their "high-quality" ones.



These animals are made of much denser, almost rubbery plastic. They have fine details and are quite life-like. They have no packaging at all, which is probably why I didn't notice the price until I paid the bill!

HOLY MOLEY!

So what's worse? Being ripped off buying cheap plastic or being ripped off buying expensive plastic? I'm not sure.

I just wish I hadn't bought any of it.

My Christmas Nightmare

I dreamt last night that I was enjoying myself on a vacation and I went to the airport to catch my return flight. There, I met an older woman who seemed fairly stressed out.



"Well, tomorrow is the big day!" she said.

"What big day?" I asked.

"Christmas!"

"What? What's the date today?" (Even in my dreams I'm a complete ninny.)

Of course, it was December 24th. And I was completely unprepared for Christmas. Panic! But then I began to think about what I did have done, and even in my dream I began to relax. It was going to be a crazy day, and Christmas wasn't going to be as well planned out as usual, but it would get done. I woke up with an adrenaline rush but also with determination.

Luckily, I still have eighteen days, and so do you.

I could take away a very obvious message from this dream: Get moving on Christmas preparations!

But did you notice the underlying theme - the more important one? In my dream I was in the airport flying home. And I had no worries about making it in time - I was definitely going to be there. That's why everything else was going to be okay. I knew I'd get done the essentials. I knew my family loved me enough to overlook any errors or shortages on the day. I knew I could explain if gifts arrived late, or the Christmas dinner wasn't spectacular.

Make your plans. Get it done. Stay within your budget.

And then forget all of that and enjoy the holidays with your family.

Christmas Lists

I love it.

I just got my husband's Christmas list. He wants one tangible item - a new hockey stick. (He plays in a local league). Everything else on the list counts as an experience, including some experiences he and I can share (like dining out).



I need to work on my own list now.

I'd like more dance classes, a few gift certificates to local eateries (I love meeting friends for lunch), maybe a day at the ski hill or a night at the movies. I think I will ask for a gift certificate to the book store. Books are things, but the experience of picking them out is the best part, and handing them on to others when I'm done is nearly as fun.

Have you made your Christmas list? How many experiences are you asking for?

Halving December?

Okay, you can't really cut a month in half, but the way December is flying by, it feels like I have.

Twenty days to get it all together for Christmas. There's so much to do!



And yet I'm not as stressed out as I could be. That's because I already cut back - on the money I planned to spend on the holidays, on the amount of activities I agreed to, and on my expectations.

I've put the kids first. They will get the same Christmas they're used to getting. I ask them to make lists. I prioritize my purchases. I spend my budget. And I stop.

I cut back on the amounts I was spending on grown-ups. We're all perfectly capable of buying things for ourselves. And none of us needs extra stuff piling up.

I also gave up on creating the "perfect" Christmas. I used to look for the perfect candlelight Christmas Eve service to re-create my childhood experiences at church. Guess what? It doesn't exist here, and we're not religious anyways. I'll take my family for a walk that night instead. We'll look at the lights in the neighborhood, the stars and the sky, the snow on the ground and trees. It's good enough.



I used to long for my family at Christmas-time, too. Now I realize that I'm blessed in a different way. We don't worry about travel, or lines, or family politics, or clashing temperaments. We have Christmas at home in a quiet way and it suits us.

There will be moments of panic between now and December 25th, but I'm determined that there will be moments of peace, as well.

How about you? How is your December going?

Time to Stop

I'm sure you've all seen this story. A Wal-Mart clerk died during the opening rush of shoppers into his store for the "Black Friday" sales. Different news companies are reporting this story differently; some blame the customers for knocking him down. Some say the man had a heart attack. However it happened, what came next shows the depths to which consumers in our country have descended. Some customers stepped over the fallen man in their rush to shop. Other store workers attempting to help him were hurt by the pushing crowd. Shoppers who found items they wished to purchase were angry and refused to leave when told the store was closed.

What on earth?

All this for a holiday supposed to celebrate the coming of the light in the midst of the dark?

I feel like the attention frugality is getting these days is the real ray of light in the darkness. It's like a drink of cold, pure water after a night spent eating and drinking way too much. Like the serenity of a desert sunrise after the neon glare of a Tokyo business junket.

We make ourselves sick with our excess. It's time to stop.

How about taking a day off from shopping? How about a week? How about deciding that for 24 hours at least you will not even think about the presents that need to be bought/wrapped/shipped/stuck under the tree?

It will still get done. You know it will. So what if they're late? So what if you don't spend as much or they're not perfect? It doesn't matter. None of it matters. Christmas doesn't matter. There; I've said it.

Somebody died today.

That's what matters. Now gather your family around you. Hug them. And start talking about the changes in this world that you'd like to make.

The Holidays are Coming!

I can hear the groaning.

But yes, it is coming, and if you face it now your December will be much better. The years when all my shopping and prep work happens before December first have been my favorite Christmases. So this is a heads up that I'm going to be posting holiday suggestions in the days ahead.

The first thing to do is to get a feel for the big picture - what needs to be done to make your holidays (whichever ones you celebrate) special. Pull together some paper and pens, your calendars, holiday planning guides and so on and start jotting down ideas.



You'll want lists for:

Special dates/celebrations/parties: use your calendar to figure out what events you'll host, what activities you attend every year, your travel plans and so on.

Gift lists: who will you buy or make gifts for? When do packages need to be sent by? Assign a budget to each person and brainstorm gifts within this budget so you are not tempted to overspend when you hit the stores. If you're making gifts, get going! Pick reasonable projects and make sure that if you're making gifts to save money, that you're actually saving money! Some homemade items are more expensive than store bought.



Your own gift list: don't wait until the last minute! No one likes to buy things for others they know won't be appreciated or used. Let people know what you really want!

Decorations: a list to buy and a list to make. It's easy to go out and blow a ton of money on pretty decorations. I view accumulating holiday decorations as a lifetime endeavor. I will probably have enough when I'm a grandmother. Each year look through your old decorations and maybe pictures from last year and decide on a few things that will really make a difference. Go to the store with your list in hand and don't deviate!

Food: if you start buying staples this month you know you'll need in December you won't feel so short of cash next month. Extra flour and sugar, canned goods, and so forth are all good bets. Better yet, start making a menu plan for all the "regular" days next month. Hit up frugal menu planning sites to make these meals as cheap and easy as possible. That frees up cash for the important meals and the times you'll be entertaining.

Other Lists: your greeting card list, ideas for what to do over vacation with the kids, what needs to be cleaned, fixed or bought before company comes and so on.

Next I'll post about the most important list of all.

Halving Birthday Parties

Next Friday we're hosting a birthday party for my 7 year old daughter. I'm feeling pretty calm about it, but that wasn't always the case. I remember one year I picked out a bunch of party favors and when the cashier rung them up they totalled three times my budgeted allotment for the whole party!



I'm a little savvier these days. I'm also stubborn. I believe in celebrations that don't break the bank. I also believe that if I host a low-cost party, other parents will feel comfortable hosting low-cost parties of their own. That feels much better to me than setting the bar uncomfortably high.

So how am I keeping my daughters' party low-cost? This year I'm having a cooking theme. I'm make pizza dough ahead of time in bulk and each child will be able to roll out their own personal pizza, and put on toppings. To cut costs when I make pizza I buy canned pasta sauce (under $2.00 per can), huge blocks of cheese from the warehouse store, and uncut pepperoni. For meat-lovers, you can also simply brown a bunch of cheap ground beef and add garlic and italian herbs.

While the pizza is cooking the kids will frost and decorate pre-made cupcakes. After lunch they'll play some traditional party games, and have some free time. Their goody bags will contain homemade prezels and cookies. I'm praying for sunshine, but we'll improvise if the kids need to be inside the whole time.

Simple, fun, yummy....done!

The Wal-Mart Trap

I went shopping today for Christmas presents.

Yep - you read that right. It's eighty degrees and high summer, but I've got snowflakes and fir trees on my mind. I leave for Canada two weeks from today and when I do I want to leave behind me a nice stack of presents for all my east coast kin.

I liking giving people gifts, but most years I get frustrated with Christmas. I try very hard to give meaningful things. I make lists ahead of time and try not to repeat past gifts, but what I'd really like to do is not give any "thing" at all - I'd like to give experiences.

Sometimes I pull this off - with gift certificates to movies or restaurants, but often I succumb to the idea that a card or envelope isn't fun to unwrap come Christmas morning, and I end up getting the "thing", anyway.

I succumbed again this year - at least in terms of my neice and nephews. I have some hope of doing better with their parents, at least.

I'm starting to make up my own Christmas list now, so at least I won't get caught with too many packages under the tree. I really do want those cards and envelopes, instead - a semester of dance classes, or a monthly pass to the gym. Maybe a trip to see friends or a fancy dinner I can share with my husband.

I hope this experiment will cure me of the need to load family and friends down with packages next Christmas. I can't be the only one that wants a gift that provides more to look forward to than just that "ah!" moment on December 25th.